Title IX: Happy Birthday to Me! I’m 39 and pretty darn proud of myself.

Average Josephine: So what’s the big deal. It’s not your 21st. Aren’t you a little old for a birthday party?

Title IX: My 30s are way better than my 20s. I’ve really hit my stride. For a long time people thought I was just an athletics type of gal, but now they know that I’m multi-talented.

Average Josephine: So what’s your point. You seem a bit full of yourself.

Title IX: Well, I should be. You’re a bit young, but back in the day a college could refuse to admit you just because you’re a woman. And even if you did get in, you couldn’t study just anything. Have you ever heard of Home Economics?

 Average Josephine: No

 Title IX: Google it.

 Average Josephine: Fine. But that was a long time ago. What have you done for me recently?

 Title IX: Well, you know that favorite show of yours?

 Average Josephine: You mean, 16 & Pregnant?

 Title IX: Yeah. Well I protect pregnant and parenting students too. I don’t take any crap.

 Average Josephine: What kind of crap?

 Title IX: When schools try to force pregnant and parenting students to drop out by not giving them excused absences for birth and recovery. And doing other ridiculous things like banning these gals from prom as a “punishment.”

 Average Josephine: That’s crazy stuff. Does that still happen?

 Title IX: Unfortunately all the time. Let’s just say it keeps me busy.

 Average Josephine: So what’s your plan for your 40th?

 Title IX: Big party. Huge. I’m starting the planning tomorrow.

 Average Josephine: Leave it to you to be an overachiever.


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